I am no scaredy cat..

I like to think I'm a brave person. That when faced with danger, I will prevail victorious. However, little by little, I'm starting to doubt my Ninja ability.

It all started a couple of weeks ago when Jeremy left for work. He leaves for work really early allowing me about an hour of really good, hard sleep. And I take full advantage. I spread out on the bed and probably sleep the hardest in that hour. Except on that particular morning.... Like I said, Jeremy had already left for work. The door was locked. I was in deep sleep mode when a strange man comes into my bedroom and awakens me. Unlike what I always envision happening in this moment, I freeze. I can't scream. I can't run. All I can do is lay there scared out of my mind. That is until the strange man speaks and tells me its okay he's Jeremy... my former favorite husband... who is profusely apologizing for scaring me...

Last week, Jeremy decided that putting his jacket in the closet was just too much work. So he hung it over our office chair in our guest bedroom. Honestly, it wasn't that big of a deal except I kept forgetting it was there. For two days, every time I passed the bedroom, I would think there was a man sitting in that chair and get totally freaked.

He, then, moved it to hang in our hallway. Same problem. I would forget, catch a glimpse of it from the corner of my eye, and then run for the corner. Finally, I told the jacket what I thought of it and threw it in the closet... It's just lucky I didn't pull out my pepper spray!

Then, I may have had a heart attack from being scared. Seriously. It was late Sunday night. Jeremy had fallen asleep on the couch and like any good wife I left him there so that I could have the bed to myself. I was in a deep, deep sleep when our bedroom door flew open with the loudest bang. I awoke scared, delirious, and with a throbbing chest. Of course, it was my wonderful husband who had woken up on the couch and decided that he wanted to come to bed. But did he really have to make his decision known to our neighbors??

So now, I am forced to "sleep" with a bat, pepper spray, and whistle. And since the pattern seems to involve Jeremy, I'm considering putting a bell on him... or at least tic tacs in his pocket...