August 21, 2012

I'm done.

True Story. 

I'm currently 21 weeks and still throwing up 3 times each day. I thought I was better, the doctor got a bright idea, and now I am worse. My uterus is yelling at me. I'm yelling at the unborn within me. And, honestly, I'm just plain over being pregnant. Having one bad day knocks me on my butt for at least two days and I just can't be knocked down anymore. I've got things to do! And so I rant to you, Internet Friends, as I enter the longest part of my pregnancy feeling miserable and just wanting to be done so that I can wake up and fix my son breakfast without having to say "I'm sorry, but Mommy has to run to the bathroom one more time." It's annoying and old. Thus, my uterus has declared she's retiring for good in the form of a very nice letter. I appreciate her and her willingness to carry two children, but I couldn't agree more. She needs to retire.


Dear Mr. and Mrs. Johnson,

This is my formal notification that I am retiring from my post as Child Developer effective January 2013. It has been a pleasure and an honor aiding in the protection of your two little ones while they grow within Mrs. Johnson's womb. However, the recent discovery that I am currently holding a GIRL has made my need to stay around any longer unnecessary. I hope you both will understand my need to move on. If you are still in doubt, I have made a list of things that make a family of four the perfect number:
  1. Two words: Game nights.
  2. You aren't out numbered.
  3. Tag teaming parenting
  4. The baby stage will end sooner for you than those who multiply more which means you'll be sleeping and able to remember what you did yesterday before they will. You will then be able to rub it in. 
  5. Disney World has family packages for families of 4.
See? A family of four is a great thing.

I really appreciate the opportunities I have been given here, and I am happy for your growing family and pray that the Lord bless you. And just know that until January 2013, I will continue to help protect Madelyn Bree.

Jessica's uterus


And, thus, we end the baby making era. Sorry Grandparents, but you'll just have to wait for another kid to step up to the plate. This throwing up for nine months straight is for the birds.

1 comment:

Sarah H. said...

Aww :( That's NO fun. What was the Dr.'s bright idea? I think you should switch to a prenatal vitamin just for hyperemesis. It's called Redichew Rx Chewable Prenatal Multivitamin made by Vitamed MD. It has only what you really need, and the stuff good for nausea----VitD3, VitB2, B6, B12, and folic acid.

And what about zofran? Are you taking that still?